FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE – OFFICE OF THE PRESS SECRETARY – EXECUTIVE BRANCH

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December 30, 2006

KIDS CONTEST! Draw Saddam Dying and Win an Authentic Executioner's Ski Mask!

ATTENTION BOYS AND GIRLS: Saddam Hussein, the swarthy boogey man who haunts our patriotic dreams, is DEAD! Hooray! And now YOU can win a valuable keepsake* to remember our proud country's orgy of nationalistic bloodlust for the broken dictator who had nothing to do with 9/11TM! Simply break out your Crayolas (or fire up MS Paint), draw Saddam getting rubbed out by a sectarian lynch mob that's hell-bent on vigilante payback, and YOU can win big!

[UPDATE: Contest Has Concluded.]

GRAND PRIZE WINNER: Mikhail Calkins

FIRST RUNNER-UP: Debbie Shapse

SECOND RUNNER-UP: Michael Doty

SAMPLE ENTRY: Jenna B.

Thanks to all the patriotic boys and girls who sent in such beautiful art. You're ALL WINNERS – except not really.

* Noose not included.