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For 2003, President and Mrs. Bush's personal Christmas card list grew to include the most recipients ever – over 175,000
highly deserving Ranger and Patriot-Level campaign fund-raisers and corporate PAC donors representing all fifty states and
every imaginable hue in the Caucasian color spectrum.
Printed on exquisite handmade paper pressed from genuine clear-cut redwood and sequoia pulp, each 2003 White House Christmas
card is personally faux-signed by a perky, ink stamp-wielding intern who is 100% guaranteed to have never savored
even a driblet of Presidential DNA jelly.
In the grand Christmas tradition of briefly pretending to dispense with classism, President and Mrs. Bush reluctantly permit all lesser
Americans to gaze upon inferior digital reproductions of this priceless, limited edition historical artifact:
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